He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
