i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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