so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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