PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
