Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
