it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
