this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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