i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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