I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
even my farts smell like vagina
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
its liver damage thursday
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
