Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
