i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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