THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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