kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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