Texts From Last Night

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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not

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  (937): Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not http://tfl.nu/mdp5
  Replies (27) Good night (708) Bad night (2665)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth

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  (314): eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth http://tfl.nu/8d45
  Replies (26) Good night (1005) Bad night (4709)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...

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  (713): well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer... http://tfl.nu/85fe
  Replies (22) Good night (3674) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth

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  (313): you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth http://tfl.nu/33ft
  Replies (31) Good night (2008) Bad night (6340)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.

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  (412): im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs. http://tfl.nu/u0xf
  Replies (10) Good night (890) Bad night (4405)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?

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  (419): You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text? http://tfl.nu/28br
  Replies (8) Good night (4252) Bad night (1167)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.

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  (860): i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm. http://tfl.nu/uzjb
  Replies (20) Good night (4093) Bad night (1274)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.

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  (845): Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes. http://tfl.nu/h1wx
  Replies (2) Good night (2788) Bad night (925)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend

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  (920): I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend http://tfl.nu/kstp
  Replies (4) Good night (2817) Bad night (887)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...

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  (774): Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face... http://tfl.nu/rmtg
  Replies (13) Good night (2907) Bad night (1305)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.

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  (850): There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends. http://tfl.nu/r3vo
  Replies (3) Good night (1682) Bad night (559)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing

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  (336): So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing http://tfl.nu/2fy2
  Replies (10) Good night (1418) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless

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  (860): The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless http://tfl.nu/aa5s
  Replies (9) Good night (2525) Bad night (456)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...

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  (+44): I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt... http://tfl.nu/1ly3
  Replies (1) Good night (682) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.

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  (773): If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks. http://tfl.nu/wf91
  Replies (1) Good night (388) Bad night (355)

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