Texts From Last Night

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  (269): View more from Michigan

  3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall

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  (269) 3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall http://tfl.nu/8qr4
  Replies (7) Good night (1153) Bad night (2215)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman

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  (250): I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman http://tfl.nu/ee4v
  Replies (2) Good night (903) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.

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  (717): Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze. http://tfl.nu/xfyl
  Replies (25) Good night (4649) Bad night (780)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...

  (425): View more from Washington

  Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.

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  (206): The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies... (425): Let's let the open bar be the judge of that. http://tfl.nu/ch8t
  Replies (7) Good night (5922) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.

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  (401): I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails. http://tfl.nu/8vyo
  Replies (10) Good night (3987) Bad night (1583)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.

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  (416): Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer. http://tfl.nu/oqpc
  Replies (6) Good night (2113) Bad night (1338)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.

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  (406): He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine. http://tfl.nu/2wf3
  Replies (14) Good night (1462) Bad night (3235)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.

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  (443): Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion. http://tfl.nu/xb4s
  Replies (7) Good night (1240) Bad night (2582)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.

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  (912): thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit. http://tfl.nu/e0ki
  Replies (12) Good night (1267) Bad night (911)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...

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  (803): Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday... http://tfl.nu/4ejd
  Replies (8) Good night (1544) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.

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  (318): They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it. http://tfl.nu/p3lc
  Replies (8) Good night (3288) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila

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  (607): I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila http://tfl.nu/x7nj
  Replies (6) Good night (689) Bad night (1588)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.

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  (317): I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis. http://tfl.nu/cvxz
  Replies (5) Good night (689) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.

  (206): View more from Washington

  WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN

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  (702): All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze. (206): WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN http://tfl.nu/b6xg
  Replies (1) Good night (565) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.

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  (757): If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible. http://tfl.nu/lbns
  Replies (2) Good night (430) Bad night (109)

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