hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize