I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
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My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
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What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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