Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
