she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
