I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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