And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding