I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize