Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
