quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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