forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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