theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Randomize
