Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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