you win again, gameday.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize