why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
