I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
