he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
