Screwed.edu
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
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