I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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