too bad you live with your parents still
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
