I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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