I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
