Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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