and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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