Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
These tits shall not be calmed
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize