Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize