Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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