break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
