Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
That accounts for only three of the penises
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
