You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize