? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
