i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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