It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
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