i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize