I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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