Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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