walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I didn't notice because vodka
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
