The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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