Having a random hookup so left but love u
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
